A SHITTY YEAR 2/27/06

Can a winter be any crappier, without someone dying?. No. Since September 2004 to December 2005, from Italy onward, I had the illusion that I was in control, and could do anything how hard it was. Then had bike accident in December 2005, but even from that I figured I could pull a Museeuw and with hard work it wasn't much of a setback (though three months later two fingers still ripped up and one in a splint.) Luckily I had gotten a Kirk Kinetic Trainer, which becomes harder with the more power you apply, just like on the road--as I more than doubled my indoor trainer minutes from last year to this year. (The computrainer looked interesting, designing courses and riding famous but there were 2000 reasons not to get it, expect in 3 years price will fall, with computer, from $2000 to $500 and then it will be great)

Then, the accident wasn't enough the wrath of Zeus came down.

My youngest came down with a brain tumor. It was so incredibly fucked up scary until they figured out it was "probably" benign, and still scary as still had to go through brain surgery. Ironically she saw many doctors who saw me in ER two months ago, (great neurosurgeon who I didn't remember but remembered me--thought he'd be an old stern graybeard, turned out to be younger then me and with a real gentle manner, and treated daughter wonderfully) and luckily operation a success. And while daughter acting a little teenage flaky the past year she did the greatest job getting ready and staying in control before surgery. Great attitude-I'm so proud of her. But longest 1 month, from dx to operation, in my life. Luckily work/ bosses great, understanding and supportive.

But all this shit wasn't even enough. During this US Senate took a vote which essentially would do away with my job. After a week of posturing and hijinx It lost by one vote--conservative Republican's (didn't want taxpayers screwed) joined with liberal Democrats (didn't want workers screwed.)

When all this going on incredibly frustrating that you realize you are not in control of anything--nothing you can do can change anything. Low to no energy most times this year. I suddenly feel so fuckin old. Can we start 2007 now??

My baby posed with Litespeed when I first got it. Ironically she wouldn't ride a bike as helmet would mess up her hair. No one could have done a better job facing major surgery than she did.

(Postcript--a good byproduct of my being in intensive care with head injury, was that after my accident, for a month everything moved in slow motion--I couldn't focus, would take me a day to read the comics page. So when daughter recovering from her surgery, I had empathy I might not have had to help her along at her pace.)